I’ve never been a big fan of “date” movies — romantic comedies where you know the guy and the girl are going to get together at the end, but not sure exactly how they’ll get through the mess created during the first twenty minutes of the film. With these types of films, part of the plot line usually has to do with a guy who’s afraid of commitment.
I usually get frustrated with this plot line – the gal should just move on (or to make it a movie more to my liking, blow up his car while he’s driving away). But no, it gets drawn out for 90+ minutes and somehow the guy sees the err in his ways and decides that he was wrong to not commit in the first place and spend the second half of the movie trying to correct the situation. In most cases, there’s a happy ending but not always. But what’s interesting is that fear or lack of commitment happens a lot in real life and the results are often not a happy ending.
The Trouble With Thinking Big
Many people that keep up with the latest trends in personal development find themselves surrounded by fads. These fads are often started by a new book, film or web site and then spread like wildfire. Some of them work while others are just noise.
One that I’ve been seeing and hearing over and over again is the concept of thinking big – if your goal isn’t big, throw it out and find a bigger one. To me, it’s just another way for people to feel like they’re moving towards their goals when they’re really not.
Don’t Blink
There’s a song by Kenny Chesney called “Don’t Blink” that has an interesting message to it. It’s about a guy watching the news where a man that just turned 102 is being interviewed. The reporter asks the man for advice on how to reach 100 years and the man essentially tells the reporter to enjoy life because “100 years goes by faster than you think. So don’t blink.”
The message from the song is so true. You’re a kid and then before you know it, you’re a young adult getting married. And then all of sudden you’ve got children, and then grandchildren and then you and your spouse have reached the 50 year mark.
The Trouble with Being Alone
Author Harvey Mackay once wrote that the only time you’re truly alone is when you’re about to die and when you’re about to give a speech. While there’s definitely some truth (and humor) in that statement, there’s also a lot more to being alone than we sometimes realize. And by “alone” I mean not having another person in the same room or general area as you — not the lack of a significant other.
While many people do appreciate their alone time, and some even prefer it, it can be a tricky time for the some of us. I appreciate alone time every now and then to read, work and gather my thoughts, but I love being around people. When I was in graduate school, I found myself with a lot more alone time than I was used to because most of friends were working or off campus for the weekend. At first it didn’t bother me so much, but after a while it started getting to me. I just found myself unhappy and couldn’t understand why. Eventually things changed and I had plenty of company whenever I wanted it. But I still find it interesting how being alone can have some odd effects on people.
Can Prayer Make You More Successful?
I had a discussion with some friends recently about prayer and whether or not there’s a point to it. We all agreed that many people misuse prayer for things like getting a good hand at the poker table, winning the lottery or their favorite team winning the Super Bowl. And of course, when it doesn’t work out, they blame whoever or whatever they’re praying to.
It’s interesting because I believe that prayer, when done correctly, can be extremely effective — and not in the big miracles that many televangelists show so you can send them money, but in everyday life. Even if someone is an atheist or agnostic, they can benefit by doing the same process (for example, a lot of the Law of Attraction folks like to pray to the universe).
The Power of Forgiveness
Life is not fair – it never has been nor will it ever be. Unfortunately, one of the most unfair parts of life is that occasionally, we’re treated unfair by others. Sometimes there’s something bothering them and we’re in the wrong place at the wrong time. Other times, the person is simply mean spirited and inflicts pain on whoever he or she comes into contact with. Whatever the case, the worst thing we can do is allow that pain to hurt us over and over again.
Growing up I was the type of person to carry a grudge. When someone wronged me, I wanted revenge – with interest. Yes, it wasn’t enough to simply clear my name or collect my damages, I felt the need to destroy the other person. As soon as someone did something bad to me, I’d start plotting my revenge. It would consume me to the point where I’d be so angry, the mere mention of the person I was angry with would result in a verbal diatribe that could only be described as hateful. I became a miserable person to be around.
Personal Success: When People Have Wronged You
I recently came across a piece of advice that I’ve seen a lot of folks recommending (and they of course claim to implement it themselves). The piece of advice is simple — each night before you go to bed, forgive those who have wronged you that day. It’s a zen-like attitude to clear your mind and conscience so that you can rest well and be more focused the next day. But does it really work?