If there’s one thing we can learn from our politicians, it’s that you should always be on your best behavior because someone is always watching – especially now since most people carry cell phones that capable of taking still pictures and many can even capture high definition video. To spin that around and look on the bright side, that also means that you have a lot more opportunities than you often realize.

I can assume that if you’re reading this, you tend to deal with people frequently throughout your day. Regardless of whether you’re looking for work, trying to expand your business or simply looking to improve yourself, there’s a good chance that there are people out there that can help you. As I teach the people that take my networking courses, these people are everywhere and often in the places that you least expect.

I’ve connected with people that have helped me at conferences, seminars and professional networking events. That’s not a big deal because most of us have done just that. However, I’ve also connected with people at the gym, in an elevator, on an airplane, on vacation, while at jury duty and even in a waiting area (at a doctor’s office and while my car was having work done).

It’s our natural tendency to keep to ourselves unless we’re in a situation where we’re supposed to talk to other people. But you can often double, or even triple, the amount of connections you’ll make by just striking up a conversation with people who, like you, are stuck somewhere waiting for something. I’ve received tips on where to get hard to find products while waiting in line at the supermarket, learned about a company I was trying to get an interview with while waiting for an oil change and talked a woman into taking one of my classes during an elevator ride.

Even if you don’t make a connection where you exchange cards and set up a lunch meeting, you can still learn valuable tips and information by just being friendly. I met a guy at a gas station (while we were each filling up) who owned a nearby ski shop and told me about an organization he belonged to – I eventually spoke at one of their meetings.

So opportunities are everywhere – especially where you least suspect them. Be friendly, be professional and be kind to everyone you meet as you never know how you may be able to help each other.

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Have you ever let an opportunity pass you by because the timing was never right? Is there something that you wish you could do but it just never seems like the right time? Hesitation is one of those things can either prevent us from making a decision that wasn’t well thought out or allow us to procrastinate our dreams away.

There’s a sales tactic related to timing that many people use to pressure potential buyers into purchase something they’re hesitant on. They say things such as:

• If you had waited until you could have afforded the perfect wedding, you would have been too old to enjoy your honeymoon.
• If you had waited until you could have afforded your dream house, your first house would be in a retirement community.

Yes, these are silly examples (and I have a lot more where they came from), but it’s a tactic that works because it’s common for people to wait until everything is perfectly in place before making a decision or taking an action. So I’ve been using this tactic a lot – on myself. It, like many other sales techniques, can be used for self-motivation. I discovered the effectiveness of doing this a few years ago when I used this very technique to push out the redesign for my web site.

I began working on the new site with a friend back during the summer of 2008 and I had a number of things that I wanted to include in the site. I listed out all of the things I wanted it to have, but then realized that there were a lot of things I needed to wait on. I was trying to finish up a few products I wanted to launch along with the new site (I had it in my head that it would be cool to co-promote the new site and the new products), there were some services I was relying on outside vendors on that weren’t quite ready and I was courting some other people that teach complementary topics about possible joint ventures. On top of that, I wanted to change the technology of the website to make it easier for me to update and maintain.

When I looked all of these things, I realized that I would be into 2009 by the time everything I needed was in place. The problem was that I needed it done by September of that year because I had a number of private speaking engagements as well as public classes offered in some new areas. My website, as it existed, simply wouldn’t do as it didn’t have a professional look to it.

So what we did was look at the list and weeded out all the features that were nice to have but didn’t provide any immediate benefits. Then, we focused on what was needed by the deadline and got those pieces in place. The two most important things that were needed was the new design (the old one just looked too amateurish) and the updated information and features to help me convert visits into revenue. Knowing what was coming up on the horizon, I also put some things in place to make it easier to add the additional features.

We ended up pushing it out by our deadline and I was extremely happy with the results. I got a lot of complements from people at my speaking events that had gone to my website to check me out ahead of time (my old site lacked things as basic as a bio on me). Shortly afterwards when my products were ready, I added that part of the site (and I add new products as they are available). Finally, during a slow period, I got the pieces in place to make adding dates for my classes easy. What used to be an hour long task now takes me about five to ten minutes and the information is now consistent throughout my site. Had I waited for the timing to be right, I’d probably be still planning my big site redesign.

I’m sure you can relate to this both personally and professionally. It’s so easy to put things off until the right time: “I’ll ask that guy or girl out when things slow down at work.” “I’ll start looking for a new job in the fall when everyone is back from vacation.” “I’ll start exercising in the spring when the weather gets nicer.” Have you ever caught yourself thinking these things? Throughout the years I’ve been guilty of all three (and many more).

This is where we can get stuck because you can always find a way to make something better. You need to differentiate your “must haves” from your “nice to haves” and get them done. The best time to do something (and complete it) is now.

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For the past several years, we’ve all been subjected to the grim economic outlook that most media outlets are focused on. Even when a good report comes out, it’s often followed by more of the bad news thus neutralizing any positive effects. While it makes great news, it would be much better if instead of making it worse by constantly focusing on it, they instead reported on people who have learned to deal with it. Since they won’t do it, I guess we’ll just have to discuss how to stay focused on your goals while the rest of the world is screaming that the sky is falling.

First, it’s important to be aware of what’s going on so you can prepare adequately and to not be in denial about things. But it’s also important to keep in mind that there are things we do have control over – such as our minds and our actions. So although it can seem impossible at times, the opportunity to do extraordinary things still exists.

It’s the tough times that test our resolve and commitment. I think back to when I was a kid and regularly played after school sports. The kids that were serious about sports (and eventually became the stars of the varsity team a few years later) were the ones that would play every day, even when bad weather hit. The ones that weren’t passionate about the game or were only there because their parents made them, would take advantage of every excuse to go inside and do something else.

To use soccer as an example, imagine there are 20 kids that play regularly after school. There’s one soccer net that they’re all practicing kicking the ball into and therefore they need to take turns. So within an hour, they each get roughly three minutes of kicks in on a typical day.

The following day, it rains and only ten of the kids show up (for the sake of argument, let’s assume that there’s no lightening nearby and everyone is dressed appropriately so they don’t get sick). Not only are they pushing themselves harder because the mud and rain add a little bit of complexity to the game, but because there are fewer kids out there, they get double the kicking opportunities. So while their disinterested friends are inside playing video games, the hardcore players are out there improving their skills and getting the equivalent of two days of practice in.

Translating that to the real world, there are people that simply give up when times get tough. It’s easy to get discouraged during challenging times, but these are the times that it’s most important to be strong. By staying focused on your goal and not getting sidetracked by the talking heads on TV, you can come out of this thing stronger than ever.

Best Buy and Circuit City are a classic example of this rule. During the last economic downturn, Best Buy continued as planned where Circuit City cut back. Circuit City was never able to catch back up with Best Buy and has since closed down. So remember that the companies and the people that continue to keep at their goals during these tough times will only come out stronger in the end. The people who sit out the storm and try to reestablish themselves when things are good again (and they will be good again – sooner than most people think) will be playing catch up. Which kid do you want to be?

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If you ever want to kill your mood or quickly go into depression, then spend your life seeking approval from others. When you look to others for a way to feel good, you’ll find yourself doing things to impress them in the hopes that they’ll complement you. At the same time, you’re handing the power to control your feelings over to them and taking it away from yourself.

I have people in my life that will always nitpick what I do. I could be elected president of the United States and their reaction would still be something like “well, Reagan won 49 states.” I’ve gotten over it, although I’d be lying if I were to say it doesn’t annoy me every now and then, but that’s the extent of it. I’d rather be annoyed than constantly try to be someone I’m not just to make other people happy or accepting of me.

We live in a society where everything is sensationalized. Celebrities flaunt clothing, homes and attend events that we can only experience in our dreams. We see ads on TV so we can borrow money for that huge home, luxury car or lavish vacation. All for what? So we can say we drive a Mercedes, live in a posh neighborhood or travel overseas?

The worst part is that even when you have all this, it’s still not enough. You need to have more to keep up with the Jones’. You need to remodel the house, upgrade the car and vacation more frequently so that you can keep up. In the meantime, people are talking behind your back wondering how you got the money, whether you can truly afford it or will find something to nitpick about.

To make matters worse, they could deny you their approval or the pleasure of them acting impressed. So you do something, you think it’s a big deal and they play it down, crushing your ego. The worst part about it is that sometimes these people do it on purpose. It can be quite disgusting at times how some people act.

When you focus all your energy on trying to impress someone else, what you’re really doing is setting yourself up for disappointment and failure. You’d be better off becoming the you that you want to be because at the end of the day, you’re the one who has to look yourself in the mirror when you brush your teeth. It’s hard enough to set the right goals and achieve them so you can live your dreams. Don’t hand that power over to someone else, you’ll end up on the proverbial treadmill – always running but never feeling you’re getting anywhere.

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